Kalyn Chapman James, the first African American to hold the Miss Alabama title, posted a tearful video on her Facebook page Sunday that says she doesn’t want to “feel this way” but she finds it hard to be sad for the Dallas police officers and “can’t help but feeling like the shooter was a martyr.”

She later clarified her thoughts and expressed her condolences to the families of the slain officers in a statement to AL.com.

James, who was Miss Alabama in 1993 and attended the University of Alabama at Birmingham, and is now a TV host living in Miami. She is a native of Mobile.

She posted the more than two-minute Facebook Live video on her Facebook page Sunday afternoon. She was in a car and stated she had just left church.

“I don’t want to feel this way” James states in the video. “I don’t feel sad for the officers who lost their lives … I know that’s not really my heart. I value human life. And I want to feel sad for them but I can’t help but feeling like the shooter was a martyr,” she says in the video.

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