October 2, 2013
All across America yesterday, people were running into frustrating technical problems because the online Obamacare exchanges are full of glitches. Over fifty percent of the exchanges demonstrated critical failures, CNN reported. This is astonishing because CNN has long taken a pro-Obamacare stance.
“The CNN medical team branched out. We tried in about 20 different state states. In 12 of them we hit glitches,” CNN reported. “Sometimes it made it impossible to sign up. There were error messages or that little annoying kind of twirly thing.” (SOURCE)
The Obamacare websites are broken because people tried to use them
This is all happening because too many people tried to use the system, explained Obama today. Apparently, the Obamacare IT infrastructure was designed for a nation the size of Somalia, not the United States of America. Obama went on to absurdly compare Obamacare to Apple, saying it’s perfectly okay that Obamacare doesn’t work because iPhones also receive software updates from time to time. Therefore, everything is fine and we should all stop complaining about online exchanges that are broken.
“Consider that just a couple of weeks ago, Apple rolled out a new mobile operating system and within days they found a glitch, so they fixed it,” Obama said. “I don’t remember anybody suggesting Apple should stop selling iPhones or iPads or threatening to shut down the company if they didn’t.”
Nice try, Obama, but we aren’t buying it. Because I don’t remember Apple forcing me to buy their product under the threat of levying involuntary new taxes on my income, you see. To compare Obamacare to Apple is downright comedic, especially considering the fact that more than half of all Americans don’t want Obamacare, and at least a quarter of the people using Obamacare’s online exchanges are mostly just trying to find out how they can be exempt from its requirements.
The only way Obamacare is like Apple would be if Apple hired a hundred thousand armed thugs to run around the country forcing people to buy iPhones at gunpoint. And then every time you go visit your doctor, he would have to call Apple headquarters to get approval to “treat” you. But you won’t hear Obama making that sort of comparison, because he and his entire administration are still pretending that everybody somehow wants to be forced to buy Obamacare against their own will. This is where the “care” part of Obamacare comes from, just in case you hadn’t noticed.
Expect months of glitches
“In the first week, first month, first three months, I would suspect that there will be glitches,” President Obama told NPR in a widely-broadcast speech, finally admitting what his administration has been aggressively denying up to this very day: that technical glitches will plague the exchange system, making it unavailable to many who try to sign up.
“People visiting the NY State of Health website after its launch at 8 a.m. Tuesday were greeted with error messages when clicking on links to register as individuals or families,” reports CBS News. “The links for employers, employees and brokers also experienced periodic problems.”
Government officials tried to explain away the problems by saying they were caused by too many people using the system. “A spokesman for the Department of Health blamed the problems on the 2 million visits to the website in the first 90 minutes after its launch,” reports CBS News.
Somehow, in a nation of over 300 million people where Obamacare is now mandated by the U.S. Supreme Court, the New York Department of Health, which serves a population of twenty million people, did not anticipate 2 million people visiting the website.
The Obamacare exchange system, it turns out, was built to a specification that only works if nobody uses it. This apparently reflects the same kind of wisdom found in the health care system itself, where the toxic web of doctors, surgeons, cancer clinics and pharmaceuticals keeps everybody perfectly healthy unless they decide to use the system, in which case they get cut, poisoned, medicated or irradiated under the false label of “treatment.”
Government authorities say epic failure is an amazing success
Not surprisingly, in yet another Orwellian propaganda spin campaign that defies all logic, the Obama administration is calling this a great success. “We have had a few slowdowns, a few glitches, but it’s sort of a great problem to have,” said HHS secretary Kathleen Sebelius, as reported by the Washington Times. “It’s based on the fact that the volume has been so high.”
Sure it is. The more glitches and failures we all witness, the better Obamacare is working! Obviously!
Astonishingly, the mainstream media is going along with this defiance of rationality. Whereas a normal, sane person would say that a non-glitchy rollout would be a success, the Obama administration has actually managed to equate technical failure with government success. The worse it functions, the more you’re supposed to be impressed, you see, because it means Obamacare is popular!
By this same logic, the trains in Bangladesh must be wildly successful because they hardly ever run at all. If banks operated on the same philosophy, broken ATMs would be deemed highly successful, too, because no one could ever use them, thereby proving just how much popular demand there is for cash-dispensing machines.
Of course, if the Bush administration had tried to roll out something with such a high profile failure rate, the media would have eviscerated him and highlighted all the obvious glitches and government incompetence. But when the Obama administration rolls out a frustrating, error-ridden system that over half the people find impossible to use — and the other half don’t want to use at all — he is celebrated for this “stunning achievement” of forcing the entire nation into a broken, failed, glitch-infested “death care” system that doesn’t work at any level.
Let’s face it: Obamacare exchanges are the front-end failure to a system of health care failure that was only brought into law by a devastating failure of justice at the U.S. Supreme Court. There is nothing that works in this system! From top to bottom, Obamacare is a complete and utter failure.
If there’s anything we should be truly celebrating right now, it’s celebrating people like Sen. Ted Cruz who dared to take a stand against this insanity and save America from exactly the kind of glitch-ridden exercise in techno-quackery insanity that’s destroying health, devastating jobs and absolutely gutting the U.S. economy. No government program in history has created more immediate unemployment than Obamacare, and it’s time we all stood up to this insanity and demanded this unconstitutional, immoral and failed law called “Obamacare” be permanently banished from our lives.
In fact, I would ask you to sign my petition in support of all this, but I accidentally hired the Obamacare IT consultants to build a petition website and now it doesn’t work… because government programmers think Microsoft Excel is a “database application.”