“Keep the world safe boys”

Adan Salazar
February 11, 2014

Security officials at London’s Heathrow Airport courageously confiscated a miniature toy gun from an unruly passenger, after he attempted to inconspicuously sneak it through in the holster of a Woody toy doll from the Disney Pixar movie Toy Story.

"Reach for the sky!" airport security disarms toy doll. / Photo: imgur.com
“Reach for the sky!” airport security disarms toy doll. / Photo: imgur.com
Three days ago, a Reddit user posted a photo claiming that, while making his way through London’s airport security, he was stopped and his toy cowboy frisked, which the man claims he was using as a prop in photos for his son.

After giving the doll a proper pat down, officials discovered a toy gun, which according to Heathrow policy is a “banned item.”

“I have travelled the world with Toy Story’s Woody, taking pics for my son. At Heathrow, security just confiscated his ‘weapon,’ keep the world safe boys…” the potential terrorist sarcastically wrote.

While the “Heathrow Airport Guide” advises people “travelling with children” to bring their “favourite cuddly toy,” officials were likely wary of the Woody doll possibly because, as several Reddit users have highlighted, the action figure doesn’t typically carry a gun.

“Woody doesn’t even come with a gun you GO*DAMN TERRORIST,” one user furiously pointed out.

“Heathrow Airport refused to comment on the matter and but said that security rules are drawn up by the Department For Transport,the Daily Mail reports.

This marks the second time in three months that airline security has protected the airways from a potential terrorist disguised as a child’s play thing.

In December, T.S.A. officers at the Lambert – St. Louis International Airport diligently disarmed a cowboy sock monkey who was holstering a “realistic” two inch toy pistol. Officers held up the passenger’s bag, containing a “Rooster Monkburn” sock monkey, and asked, “Whose is this?,” prompting the passenger to confess ownership.

While security busies itself thwarting gun-toting action figures and stuffed monkeys, the Department of Homeland Security is busy granting VIP status to terrorists from groups such as the Muslim Brotherhood – which the Egyptian government declared a terrorist organization shortly after the ouster of democratically-elected president Mohammed Morsi – and accosting writers who read conservative newspapers.

Thankfully the U.S. and U.K governments have security teams in place ensuring travelers remain safe from the threat posed by toy dolls. With laughable security busts taking place on a routine basis, it’s no wonder the T.S.A. has to threaten passengers with arrest if they crack jokes about its overzealous, and almost wholly theatrical, policies.

In London, as in the United States, the threat of terrorism keeps the public in constant panicked fear and counter-terrorism funds flowing.

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