Taking full responsibility for the unspeakable horrors that the CIA inflicted on supposed terrorists, Evil Sith Lord Dick Cheney goes all-in with his pompous, self-righteous, unapologetic soliloquy to the world.

As news of the impending CIA torture report echoed back and forth through the political zeitgeist for the last week or so, many demanded that it stay secret because it might stain our supposed moral superiority. Others clamored for its release in full, exposing the inhumane treatment and double standards implemented by our secret government.

In the middle of all of this, Dick Cheney has surfaced out of his demonic cesspool to seemingly gloat about his involvement and double down on his justifications that unspeakable acts were not only necessary but just and righteous.

Through his rambling pompous screed, he continues to contradict himself and mockingly taunt the world with his sneering persona of untouchable arrogance. He begins by calling it a “terrible piece of work… where a group of politicians get together and sort of throw the professionals under the bus.” He goes on to call it “full of crap” and “deeply flawed,” while simultaneously confirming that everything in it is true and that he regrets nothing.

He continues by “throwing” George W under the bus by claiming that he knew everything about all the “techniques” and approved of them. Whether this is true or not, it seems like a sly attempt at threatening anyone who would come after him based on the weight of the report with taking everyone else down with him. In essence this interview is basically a confession and a brazen challenge to anyone who would pursue him criminally. He is telegraphing quite clearly that he will not be the scapegoat.

When asked piercing questions about specific torture techniques, he demurs, claiming he didn’t know specifics, and in the same breath claiming complete knowledge and approval of all the aspects of the torture program. He claims that both he and Bush knew, but each time he’s asked about specific acts such as anal “rehydration,” he says “I don’t know anything about that.” He claims he has read the report, then later that he hasn’t even read the report, then pronounces it full of crap.

He even goes so far as to gleefully recount his involvement in the process as his responsibility as VP, clearly making the implication that it was his idea. Can you imagine someone like Dan Quayle heading a task force to systematically kidnap and torture people from across the world?

He repeatedly falls back on the shrill mantra of “3000 people who were killed in cold blood,” cynically citing the 911 attacks as justification for torture. The recursive implications of this cyclical Rube Goldberg-esque chain of reasoning would give M.C. Escher vertigo to the tune of Cheney cackling maniacally in a fugue state in “the Bunker.”

When he is shown a clip of Vietnam POW McCain excoriating the torture program, he shrugs it off glibly and blithely, calling a Colonel Wilkerson expressing his regret of having to “wear the taint of inhuman and evil methods,” “not a fan.”

Germans who commanded similar tortures were hung until dead at Nuremberg. If there is any justice in this world Dick Cheney will be called to account for his evil deeds and sentenced accordingly.

“And let me make clear that while this law is first applied against German aggressors, the law includes, and if it is to serve a useful purpose it must condemn aggression by any other nations, including those which sit here now in judgment,” noted Justice Robert Jackson at the Nuremberg trial.

Watch the astonishing interview….

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