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After half a century of seeing young people’s trends come and go, I’m convinced that the current rash of gender dysphoria cases is largely a fashion, not the product of careful medical diagnosis.
“Gender-affirming care” is off the mark. Persuasive statistics say that 80-90% of gender-confused children will simply grow out of it, and that an instant leap to “affirm” a confused person only adds to his or her mental chaos.
Four forces are the most likely causes of the recent torrent of cases:
1. Covid-induced fear and social isolation
2. Prolonged exposure to social media such as TikTok, Snapchat, and Instagram. Facebook lists 56 genders to choose from
3. News media that push “preferred gender-sensitive pronouns” such as “it,” “they,” “ze,” or “hir,” and the normalization of being gay, lesbian, queer, or nonbinary
4. Adults who have become enablers, many of them trans activists
Marshall McLuhan was right in 1967: The medium IS the message.
Computers ARE massaging children’s brains into numbness that blurs the distinction between virtual and real reality. Is it any wonder that children today say they are cats or “furries” who want litter boxes in school bathrooms to piddle in, and tampons and menstrual pads in boys’ bathrooms?
Rather than rush to “gender-affirming care,” let’s say this to our confused children: “Nature’s cycles caused us to grow into adults during our teen years. We adjusted to changes in our bodies and lives, and so will you. Let’s find some new friends and get you into a more positive social group on a sport team or in school or community activities. And let’s get you outdoors to enjoy fresh air and Nature.”
Here are five suggestions that can stop the (tiny minority) tail from wagging the dog:
- Parents must be involved in any discussions about gender/sexuality challenges. School counselors, teachers, professors, and medical professionals who give detailed gender-related advice or “gender-affirming care” to a minor student or patient without parental approval and involvement should be held accountable, probably fired.
- Professors, teachers, school counselors, doctors, and nurses should respond to gender-confused students as follows: “Your questions and comments are interesting. Where did you get such ideas?” Follow-up questions should be kind, but not affirming or enabling. If a real transgender pathology is later diagnosed by an M.D. psychiatrist who is not employed by a “gender clinic,” therapy should be prescribed by that physician.
- We need to be judgmental as well as compassionate. When youngsters say, “I love my mom because she isn’t judgmental,” we need to ask if mom REALLY thinks she should be a pal instead of a parent who sets boundaries. Likewise, medical and educational professionals should judge their patients’ and students’ successes and challenges in a manner that balances authentic caring with clinical objectivity.
- Stop creating “newspeak,” as Orwell called it. No more bafflegab such as “LGBTQIA+,” “nonbinary,” “trans,” “ace,” “aro,” “gender expression,” “assigned gender,” “gender fluidity,” “gender-affirming care.” Instead of sugarcoating what we’re talking about, dare we call it “deviance”? Mathematicians know that “Standard Deviation from the Mean” is an essential descriptor. If our patients and students are to thrive, we need to be aware of their deviations from the norm and decide when such deviations are dangerous and in need of remedy. Blood pressure and heart rate are measured by comparing their consistency with, or deviation from, the norm. Why not also with self-declared gender identity? (Or are we supposed to accept the idea that norms don’t exist anymore, that anything goes, that the lessons of history no longer are based on the laws of biology?)
- Require teachers and physicians to read Senator Daniel Moynihan’s article, “Defining Deviancy Down,” so they will understand the dangers of normalizing deviance. And let’s remind our colleagues who are hypersensitive about every little bump and pain in life that they should toughen up if they are to be truly professional.
Let’s cut the nonsense, pull up our big girl/big boy pants, and enter the room with common sense adult voices.
Dale M. Herder, Ph.D., has lectured and consulted in the United Arab Emirates, the Republic of Georgia, Germany, England, Italy, New Zealand, Taiwan, Japan, and Canada. A former Fulbright Fellow in West Germany, he earned his undergraduate and graduate degrees in American Intellectual History and English at Michigan State University. He has served as a high school principal, English professor, department chair, dean, academic vice president, and interim college president. He served as a navy enlisted man and officer at sea, and he retired as a Commander after thirty years of combined active and reserve service.
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